Nothing to see here

Second guessing has had its run, and well, now it's over. Move along.

Waking Dream

What the hell, Dell?

Of course consumers want to be treated as equals in the market place, but this being said, I don't believe Dell is doing enough to fix their Della campaign because less pink isn't enough and doesn't make it right. Although I doubt that their hardware designers intended to insult half of the population, they are going to have to try harder. The tech tips are still full of fluff and need to tell us something we don't already know--I shudder to think what was listed before. Just for the record, I am brand loyal to Apple, but I had to speak to this issue. And Della, you say you're listening, are you sure you are? Until then, I'll be watching and waiting for you to pen something worth reading--you are trying to sell more than purses, right?

Lazy Lexicon: Have a ____ day.

I'm taking an interactive class called Nullify "Nice" and Abolish "Awesome": Invigorating How You Speak and Write taught by Randy Hilfman. My classmates and I have started to look at how powerful the usage of accurate words can be, or how finding and using the right words can simply be uplifting to one's spirit. Choosing the most precise word in conversation or writing isn't always easy, but I think that too often people fall into using lackadaisical lexicon--I know I do. Every conversation or correspondence is our opportunity to seize language and use our words in a more meaningful way. But don't take my word for it, take a look at this clip from George Carlin and let me know if you can relate.

Take three

telephone experiment

It's beginning to look a lot like chaos.

I stumbled on a dash of camaraderie reading through the comments left in response to Sandi Doughton's article in the Seattle Times today. Someone made a good point about Nickels and his approach to dealing with inclement weather. Imagine if instead of snowfall, we had an earthquake under his watch. The point is that if Seattle can't deal with a little bit of snow, how will we make the grade when ginormous sized chaos arrives? A little salt would have gone a long way to boost our economy this week. I'm disappointed to say the least.

Heritage. Discovered.

Starting with the unknown, to Mac's Camp Elliot at Mt. Rainier, near Paradise, I've managed to trace my lineage from the left coast to the right coast, to Sherbrook Village in Nova Scotia. Stay tuned...more to come.

A bailout on time in 2009?

I was driving over the pond on my way into work
when I heard the news on the radio: earth is
screeching to a halt. Perhaps not literally, but
just like the economy, this planet too has slowed
down. The solution? Apparently scientists
have made 2009 just that much longer: by one
second. How will you use your extra time?

"I wanted you to hit me!"

These were the words that the distraught longshoreman yelled
at my vehicle after I slammed on the breaks and skidded to
a stop, less than a foot short of hitting him. In the dark
and in the rain, clad in rubber boots, piss-soaked jeans
and a hoodie, the distraught longshoreman kept screaming
whilst jumping up and down. In an instant the same dude
was three lanes over playing frogger with oncoming traffic.
I dialed 911 and discovered that several other phone calls
had already been placed about the situation tonight in Fremont.
In Japan people find suicide partners. In America the distraught
hold up traffic and push their plans onto unwilling roads,
bridges, and strangers.

The last 24 hours struck a chord

I can't say much else without sounding totally cliché, so I won't.
But, it wasn't a shabby way to usher in my birthday and a new day.

Bird on a wire. Man on a bridge.

I've heard some describe this city as the bridge-jumping capitol,
but I'd like to think that's a stretch.

This morning a young man walked onto the Aurora bridge, with the intention to jump. Across town, a goose whose wing made contact with an electrical line, short circuited the wiring, disconnecting power to 4,000. The goose didn't survive. And, instead of water, the distaught hit cement.

Everyday luxuries, remembered:

Let's have a chat, fireside.

Instead of reading headlines, I've started watching old fireside chats with FDR:

Forced off the grid, momentarily

The sound of fourteen floors of offices instantly losing power
on Friday afternoon reminded me that it's been much too long
since I last took a break from the grid. The silence of being
unplugged brought a moment of relief from fluorescent lighting,
and the constant buzz of tireless machines, and a break for those
who push the buttons.

Suck it up

In a past life I was once made
redundant for being melancholy.
Since then I've learn to hone my
thespian skills a bit more. I've
considered meeting up with my
acting coach again, if for any
other reason to remember how to
suck it up and go lean -- stealth
style, at least for a while. I know
it would help if I made time to get
off my tush, and get outside. But
for now I'll embrace this sweet sorrow.

Tina Fey for VP

Tonight from the

debate wrap on KCTS:

JIM LEHRER: Richard, what's your first impressions here? And take it in terms -- put it in a context for us.

RICHARD NORTON SMITH, George Mason University: Sure. Well, I agree with David. I think, in a sense, that she obviously surpassed expectations if you thought that Tina Fey basically had set, you know, the threshold.


Sarah certainly filled air time with her seemingly rehearsed lines. And, I wasn't surprised when she simply avoided the questions. Her use of colloquial language was at least consistent, if not childish, but I had to chuckle when she slipped up momentarily and said, "McCain is just the man we need to leave".

Boo-hoo. Woo-whoo.

No doubt these are hard times.
Tonight we say goodbye to another
local business: WAMU. The sale
happened so quickly that I didn't
even have time to panic or
withdrawal my tiny wad. I'm
certainly not going to start
stuffing cash under my mattress,
but times are a changing.

As wet as the weather

(my nose is, that is)

Friday by noon, I found myself under
the weather. I had succumbed to what
had been cycling its way around the
office. Now, resting below the deck, I'm
reminded that it's a capitol time to
surrender: surrender to failure,
rejection, delays, life. It happens.

Going green starts at home.

It seems that everyone wants to go Green these days and I'm a bit skeptical about what this means, what with the green-washing and all. Going green doesn't necessarily mean buying new eco-friendly products, but could include buying used items or using what you already have even if it means using something for its entire lifespan. Okay, maybe I'm stating the obvious, but the upside is in the process itself because it can be a good deal of fun hunting down the right materials or waiting for them to become available after a salvage. Plus avoiding the crowds and boring inventory at the Home Depot is a bonus in my book. My partner wired up a portion of our basement connecting video, security, and cable. We are now able to turn on music remotely, just in case the cats need entertainment (har har). We needed to replace ceiling molding, so I headed over to the Re-Store and picked up a beautiful piece of maple molding that fit the bill perfectly. I'll be keeping an eye on the hot sheet for newly salvaged materials. Stay tuned for more updates on the green remodel of our 103 year old house, as we attempt to merge re-stored parts with technology.

Being popular is important.

Otherwise, people might not like you.

-- Mimi Pond
Unbridled: unrestrained
Big Thanks to Hilfman, R. for the forward from Another Word--and a Quote.

Standing Room Only

Saturday's kegerator was followed by Sunday's cure-all: a steaming bowl of Pho with extra rooster sauce. Procuring the automobile was next on the list. I dialed a cab and waited. Said cab never called and never arrived, but the 15 did, so I hopped it and with standing room only, sardined between the person in front and the obese stranger in back who was littered in snack crumbs up and down his belly, I quickly remembered how much I loathe public transportation in this town. The old fellow sitting down to my right was chewing and spitting just inches from my shoes. In my frustration, an idea struck me for an iphone application: how much easier would our lives be if we had a gps driven application that one could use to contact the nearest cabbie to your local vicinity? Of course for this to work properly, the cabbie still actually has to show up. My partner and I ruminated on the idea and then hopped off at 1st and Yesler, taking in the sights of our old neighborhood. We took on Yesler hill and 45 minutes later retrieved the motor car from the CD. I'm still feeling the burn from our urban hike a day later. Remembering my idea for the cab app, I began googling only to find that it's already been done. The application Call a Cab (scroll down to post dated Aug 17 call-a-cab-is-now-available) was released in the apps store at $1.99 a download. I'm not surprised that someone jumped on this, but it would have been a fun side project.

Pretends to tell fortunes

I know little about my past and almost nothing going back more than one generation, but I've started searching. I found an article from June 14, 1759 from the The Pennsylvania Gazette and was amused by the description of the runaway. I might have to weave the following wee bit into a story:

THREE POUNDS Reward,
RUN away from his Bail, out of St. George Hundred, New
Castle County, upon Delaware, a certain Thomas McLane, born in
Ireland, is about five Feet four Inches high, has black curled
Hair, broad Face, speaks tolerable good English, is very
talkative, and pretends to tell Fortunes. Had on, when he went
away, an old brown Coat and Jacket, Leather Breeches, Shoes
and Stockings, and an old Felt Hat. He served his Time in
Chester County, in the Province of Pennsylvania, has been in
the Back Country, and fond to boast that he has been in
several Skirmishes with the Indians. Whoever takes up the said
Thomas McLane, and secures him in any Goal, shall be intitled
to the above Reward of Three Pounds, paid by HENRY VANBEEBER.

But perhaps it's not so laughable when considering the plight of the Irish. A stark reminder that their struggle long began before the potato famine: bread riots explode in Dublin in 1740; in 1741 400,000 die of dysentery; in 1744 many people attempt to sustain themselves on a diet merely of grass.

Hot pie or code for illicit cargo?

Almost a stone's throw from my front porch and I still order for delivery from Snoose Junction Pizzeria whenever dinner plans have failed. In a nutshell, the fourth review at My Ballard DOT COM pretty much sums it up.

Currently, my favorite pie is: half of the Classic (pepperoni or Cascioppo Brothers hot Italian sausage) and half of the Margherita (Fresh mozzarella finished with fresh basil and fresh roma tomatoes).

A few noteworthy tidbits for your in-house dining experience: the seats and tables are made from recycled court house chambers and local bowling alley lanes; happy hour happens twice daily; the pinball machines are toward the back of the shop; espresso is brewed up table side. HUZZAH!

The Office

Today at the office I was carrying photocopies under my arm,
and on my way back to my desk, I gave myself a paper
cut in my armpit. Pretty good -- right?

Portrait of an artist and my tat

I'm due for an appointment to finish my tat with Tina.
My tattoo was inspired by a macro photo that I took of
a dragonfly that was part of a series of photos snapped
up at the arboretum. I stood in the marshes for about
four hours snapping images madly. My legs served
as my tripod. The piece on my back is a a collaborative
piece of art that Tina and I conjured up based on one
photo from my photo series. She's an incredible artist
and friend. I'm so honored to have worked with someone
who makes their living solely as an artist.
If you're interested in working with her, be prepared
to wait, she's usually booked pretty far out, but well
worth the wait.

Flex your sarcasm with someecards.com

I dig what I've found at someecards. I could rave on and on about these guys, but you really ought to check them out. They've created cards for every occasion and serve up unmatchable sarcasm, wit and charm. Plus they're free. Their content brings me newfound happiness!

Bitchin' Espresso

I wasn't fazed when I heard Starbucks announce their plan to close another 500 shops. They haven't pulled a decent shot of espresso ever since their transition to push-button brewing. There are many cafes in Seattle that still pull shots by hand and Caffe Fiore is one of them. They consistently serve strong, smooth, organic coffee. Plus their plastic cups and straws are made out of cornstarch, so they're compostable. They also have free wireless access. But in support of push-button brewing, I recently discovered a machine that delivers happiness in the comfort of my own kitchen: the Nespresso Essenza c100 by Nespresso at Nestle. It's both beauty and intelligence and serves up bitchin' espresso shot after shot.

Every bird won't get to fly.

Advertising that strikes an emotional chord has done its job.
I suppose this piece by Lotto was meant to be inspiring, but
it really just brought me down: just thinking about all those winged
creatures that won't get their chance to fly. Ever.

We Real Cool

This poem by Gwendolyn Brooks has been one of
my long time favorites. Each word has its place.
Listen : We Real Cool

We real cool. We
Left school. We

Lurk late. We
Strike straight. We

Sing sin. We
Thin gin. We

Jazz June. We
Die soon.

Yes we can, but don't brake my heart.

I want to believe that my vote will count to end the dynasties
that have ruled this country. I have never been so wooed and
inspired, but, at the same time I fear an entire generation
of broken hearts. This just might be the healing this nation
needs to embrace in order to restore balance with the rest of
the globe. I just really hope we don't screw up this golden
opportunity -- it could prove to be our moment of grace.
So, please Don't break my heart.

Seven Words

Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits. Here's to the original seven dirty words, because words shouldn't be banned.
R.I.P George Carlin. Great Work.

Dear Edith,

People don't change much, but places do. Last time I passed your place, your porch light was still on and your blue Chevy was parked out front. Apparently the construction that literally wrapped around and above your little home as La Fitness and Trader Joe's were raised didn't faze you. In life and death you have been and I suppose will continue to be a part of the change here in Ballard. I will watch your story to see how this all plays out. I would like to imagine that you had a plan and that somehow that plan included something other than the inevitable, but I don't know if it will matter. Goodbye Edith and goodbye to another piece of old Ballard.

XOXO,

Avril

Night unites globally, will it matter?

Bring back the night, it's -- Lights out -- Earth Hour
tonight. Although I prefer the warm glow of google.com,
in observance of this time, I'll frequent earthle.com instead
because changing a few color codes saves energy -- who knew?

Catch and Release and Catch?

What's next, Pavlov's Fish and Chips?

Click here: Remote-control fish,
and the future of the seafood industry.

What happend to the Freedom of Fish Act?

Spring equinox has sprung, so why am I still wearing a wool scarf?

• And very shortly we will have hanafubuki
  (flowers falling like snow) in Seattle.
  

Rain or Shine (but mostly cloudy) -- it's a year round eating marathon.

the Ballard Farmers Market,
where huge appetites come together.

Wax Light Saving Time

It's that time of year again and daylight saving time is back.
In the Northwest, it marks an emergence out from a long dark winter. I'm a night owl mostly, and my typical 9-5 work day is more like 8:30-6:30/7ish, with a long commute home in the dark. I think I might be ready to embrace a little more time with light. The night can wait for now.

outsourced baby, and womb vacancy

only in america,
if you're rich enough,
perhaps desperate
enough, and your
clock is ticking can
you rent a womb
in India. I guess
I shouldn't be suprised,
and well I'm not really,
but this latest trend
is very illustrative
of the many ways
we give and take in this country.

mostly we take

re: the wind, rain, and darkness

it's here.

offshore play-light savings-style

re: from shore to offshore

Obviously some countries are more symbiotic with each other than others in terms of language, time-zones,
and overall culture in relationship with outsourcing. Apparently America and Argentina are fairly tight. And many Argentine contractors gave up both industrial-revolution hours and farmers hours years ago and don't arrive to work until ten a.m. or later. A two hour lunch creates a restful laid-back pause to their days. When I grow up I'd like to keep a similar schedule. What I really meant to say was that I doubt the U.S. will give up industrial-revolution hours any time soon. But, I might. In the mean time, according to Rob Brenzy, it's a perfect astrological moment to master the art of slipping back and forth between two starkly different realities.

taking it to the tower

the northwest easily affords access to beautiful
landscapes: looking in any direction are breathtaking
views. without leaving town, one unforgettable sight
in seattle--hands down--is of mt. rainier on a clear
or cloudy day best when viewed driving south on rainier ave.
just east of the i-district and past the old wonder bread
factory. speaking of factories, i'm vacating mine ...

this is one of the last entries that i'll be leaving
from the corner loft space that i've shared with my partner
over the last four-and-a-half years in pioneer square
off the edge of chinatown. with thirteen windows, cathedral
ceilings and more room than i've known what to do with
the square footage alone has expanded my head space. i think
where you create can be just as important as what you create.
photo enclosed is just a glimpse of part of the space that has
influenced my creativity.

as part of an experiment, i'll be blogging primarily from my phone
as a trial commitment to reconnect to a more minimalist style
and on-the-go form. i'll be using blogger.com. you too can use
"push-button publishing". just email go@blogger.com to get
started. i'll be between mobile towers until you hear from me again.

XO,

avril

re: Ode to Saint Pantaleon

The American Heritage® Dictionary at Bartleby.com
offers an insightful entry on the etymology of
the word PANTS. Apparently the word first appeared
in a short story by Edgar Allan Poe and the word
was once considered vulgar ...


Go here for a bootleg copy of the Business Man; a
copy of Peter Pendulum was no where to be found.

---

killing you softly

When art and Corporate collide,
be prepared to have your heart broken.

To Have. To Behold.

Everything apple makes is pretty, mostly.
Still a somewhat recent purchase, and I haven't RTFM'd my NEW! iphone yet. I have yet to download the software i'll need to hack the volume controls because the speakerphone functions at a level that is barely audible (and i swear my hearing is near perfect). Also, the new version of the logo threw me for a loop -- I thought the swoosh in the apple logo was a crack in the screen, and I experienced a moment of panic followed with a tinge of disappointment.

Hi my name is

Avril and I am addicted to self-googling.

redundancy.

who needs it?

this is what happens

when you run out of nothing. . .

holy mother of fuck.

(my new mantra)


do try it...

my NEW! closest adviser tells me it really works
on so many levels, plus it offends the crap
out of most people.

try it.
you might like it.

holy mother of fuck.

Shake your rump.

running from the police, the press, and your parents.
and I thought the lyrics went like this:
running from the police and depressing your parents.

my guilty pleasure (this week)

October 13, 2007 - Saturday

my guilty pleasure Last night I took the carpool lane, minus passenger two or three. 1:00 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

hunger

"because if you're
truly an artist,
then you're starving,
and if you're starving,
whaddaya care if the chips smell bad,"
I like a well-penned review...
Frank tells it like it is: hunger, chips, and expiration dates

Covergirl in pastlife

DIY

More often than ____.

How often does a car crash into your house?
Once a year? How about three times in three years?

I guess it's not a big deal to replace a fence for a residential
single family dwelling, after a couple of cars plow through it,
into the yard, and on top of the front porch.

The street once coined as, "professor row," is seemingly
a magnet for this type of particular chaos. "like an earthquake,
the whole house shook, it was I think what we felt more
than the noise that woke us up," he said. Gruesome
details included in video in article below:

• Car crashes into house more often than christmas.

Having it all and wearing it too: pomo-style

Boasting of painless dentistry, the hygienist described an array of services offered to help ensure a more relaxed and pleasant visit. Naturally I expected Novocaine
because I was having a cavity drilled/filled. I was offered gas, which I gladly accepted. A head-mounted visor was offered as yet another option; I strapped it on as bulky as it was with headphones, and selected a National Geographic wildlife documentary from the library. What the heck, I opted to go for it all. Twenty minutes or so passed and I was fully immersed, watching the video and breathing in deeply from the bubblegum-scented gas mask. When I was asked to open a little wider, I couldn't engage. Mostly irritated, the dentist removed my visor, headphones and gas-mask and attempted to gently explain that the intention is for patients to choose only one option and not all three combined. Looking ridiculously pomo, I had obviously left the dentist very little room to work.